the ultimate punishment!

new year's eve, and a huge year end commission, and I decided to treat myself and my friends to a wonderful treat: a vaporizer. truly an amazing machine; I opted for a Fiji, a Chinese knockoff of the German-designed Volcano. a good clone of a great machine. testing it in the shop, it seemed to work nicely, so I grabbed it and brought it home.

the three of us are in the basement, excited at the prospect of a greater high than ever, a true state of stunted/altered bliss, and watch in awe as the balloon fills up with a soft white mist of THC, and perhaps the tiniest bit of smoke from the smoldering leaves.

I take the first hit: it is the smoothest, most delicious hit of marijuana I have ever had in my entire life. it is lightly sweet, a colorful flavor very much like the scent of the weed, but in a form that would taste delicious as a seasoning in, say, a cheesecake or a pudding.

I pass the bag, and we continue until it is empty. we are sitting contentedly, having just passed through an entire bowl's worth of weed... and then I realize that the round had probably only "counted" as "a hit." intrigued, I hooked the bag back up to the chamber back up to the base, and started it up again.

the bag filled with the same delicious mist.

we continued with this single bowl's worth of "high quality chronic" for a total of 8 rounds, reaching a peak so high and so smooth one of us said he could never go back. silently we agreed.

then the chamber was opened, and what came out looked like perfectly smokable schwag! complete with crystals! amazed and excited, we decided to load the bong up with the stuff... it filled exactly one bowl's worth. I debated passing the honor in my head, but was too high to finish thinking before I could take the first hit and...


oh.



dear heavenly existence, all things in the universes, holy terrifying mother father oh my....



the darkest, most vile, most evil smoke had filled my lungs and mouths and...




I couldn't shake it. it was death. it was disease. it was a million families' homes burning, with their New Year's Eve's guests, their children, their cars, their kitchens, their beds, all violently burning in the most horrific and devastating of fires, a nuclear fire, a biologically diseased fire, a molten mass of evil.

it was punishment. it was a wall, a line that must not be crossed. I had reached the ultimate high, and in my unawares had reached even further. I brought upon myself a cosmic smackdown, a balancing of the universe, as I was not yet ready to wield such power and wisdom... I have much further to go.

as I finally began to come to, coming out of my fight to shake off the dread, I looked up, and saw it... the card I had on the counter, reading in big letters: 29.

-B-